Documentary
2020 United Kingdom
9 minutes
Language: English
Subtitles: –
Director: Katinka Blackford Newman
Synopsis
This documentary recounts Katinka Blackford Newman’s experience with antidepressant treatment that began for insomnia and stress but quickly led to severe psychological side effects, including hallucinations and self-harm. She was hospitalized and placed on multiple medications over the course of a year, during which she became emotionally detached from her children and her life. Her condition improved only after all medications were discontinued in a public hospital. Following her recovery, she has spoken out publicly to raise awareness about the potential dangers of psychotropic drugs.
Summary
This short documentary by journalist, author, and filmmaker Katinka Blackford Newman tells a deeply unsettling personal story. Together with her two young children, she recounts how a year-long course of antidepressant treatment—initially prescribed for insomnia and stress related to her separation—nearly led to tragedy for her entire family.
Within days of starting the medication, Katinka began experiencing severe side effects, including hallucinations. In a state of confusion and distress, she injured herself with a kitchen knife and became convinced she had killed her children, describing the experience as a nightmare in which nothing felt real or meaningful.
She was subsequently involuntarily hospitalized and, over the course of the following year, prescribed a total of seven different medications. During this time, she reports feeling emotionally numb and disconnected from both her children and her sense of self. Her children, in turn, felt as though they had lost their mother, as she appeared withdrawn and unresponsive to them.
Her ordeal came to an abrupt end when, after her health insurance expired, she was admitted to a public hospital where all medications were discontinued. Within weeks, she began to regain clarity and emotional connection.
Since then, Katinka B. Newman has written a book, launched a podcast, and spoken publicly about her experience. She now advocates for greater awareness of the potential risks associated with psychotropic medications, warning of what she describes as their capacity for severe—and in some cases lasting—harm. Reflecting on her experience, she states, “I could easily have killed someone,” aligning herself with others who, she claims, have had similarly dangerous reactions.